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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29997414">I'm sorry you're WHAT?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanoodle/pseuds/justanoodle'>justanoodle</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF, smp earth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>:eyes:, Kinda, Non-Graphic Violence, SMP Earth - Freeform, Swearing, Techno did not know of Wilbur's existence, Wilbur and Techno are twins, Wilbur is a little oblivious, committing war crimes with a 13-15 year-old, kinda sus, mutual distress ensues, no beta we die like the community house, not 20s like he thought, not twenty-something like he thinks, phil does not know how piglins work, phil finds out techno is 15, some blood, techno also finds out phil is in his 30s, techno is fifteen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 19:21:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,804</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29997414</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanoodle/pseuds/justanoodle</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Oneshots of different scenarios Phil finds out Techno is fifteen and not the twenty-something year-old man he thought he was. Oh Jeb, he's been committing war crimes with a child. Crap.</p><p>This whole thing is based off of this post: https://strawberiitea.tumblr.com/post/638616181574680576/fucking-obssessed-with-the-concept-of-techno-being</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Phil Watson &amp; Wilbur Soot, Technoblade &amp; Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot &amp; Phil Watson &amp; Technoblade</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>479</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Scenario 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This whole thing is based off a post @strawberriitea on tumblr made. There were so many replies of different scenarios that I decided 'why not just do basically all of them?' so that's what I'll be doing. I honestly can't tag everyone because there are just so many people but thank you to everyone who contributed!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been a day of chaos, battle, and bloodshed and now the snowy tundra of the Antarctic Empire was painted red. Cries of agony and war had long since died out, returning the wasteland to its usual eerie silence.</p><p>Phil and Techno walked away from the battlefield, making their slow trudge towards the heart of their Empire––their home.</p><p>It took a few hours, but soon enough the duo were retiring to their respective bathrooms to wash up.</p><p> </p><p>When Technoblade emerged from his room and made his way down to the main area of the fortress, the last thing he was expecting was to see a teenager sitting there.</p><p>The boy was sitting by the active fireplace, focusing intensely on the guitar in his hands. His curly hair was tucked underneath a burgundy beanie and wire-rimmed glasses sat askew on his nose. The sweater he was wearing was patchy and old––practically falling apart. Techno didn’t know how he wasn’t cold. Even for a human, this place was freezing.</p><p>The teen looked up at the sound of footsteps echoing down the marble stairs.</p><p>“Hello!” He greeted, grinning nervously. The brunette got up and was a lot taller than Techno thought.</p><p>“Hullo.” Techno replied cautiously. He kept his stance rigid and didn’t dare relax. Who was this guy and why was he here? He must know Phil in some way because the guards would’ve surely killed him if he tried to get inside without permission.</p><p>“I’m Wilbur! You must be Techno, right? Dad talks about you a lot in his letters.” The grin never faltered as Wilbur held his hand out.</p><p>Techno took it, a bit stunned. “Uh… yeah, I’m Techno. ‘Dad’?”</p><p>Wilbur tilted his head. “Phil? You know?”</p><p>“I–” No, no, he did <em> not </em> know. Not at <em> all. </em> Would’ve been nice if Phil had mentioned he had a son at least once. Just a little heads-up, especially because he’s <em> here </em> now and Phil is Jeb-knows-where. Probably still getting cleaned up. That fucker– </p><p>So Techno kept cool and lied. “Yeah, I know. He’s mentioned you a bit.”</p><p>Wilbur beamed impossibly brighter at that. The tenseness in his shoulders loosened and he immediately relaxed.</p><p>“So why aren’t you living here instead of wherever you live?” The warrior asked, hoping it didn’t come off as rude.</p><p>“Oh! Well, I created the faction of Newfoundland. I like it more there, and here just feels too cold, y’know. You barely get any sun down here––which must be a weird way to live. Aren’t you half Piglin? You must be freezing!”</p><p>Technoblade was taken aback with the pace of whatever was pouring out of Wilbur’s mouth. Before he got the chance to even think of a reply, the brunette kept going.</p><p>“I’m here for my birthday, actually. It’s in a few days but the travel is so long and I’ve missed dad lots so I thought I’d stay a week.”</p><p>Well there’s something he can reply to. “Huh. My birthday is in a few days too, I’m pretty sure.”</p><p>Wilbur’s eyes widened. “How old are you turning? I’m turning fifteen.”</p><p>“Uh, fifteen sounds about right…?”</p><p> </p><p>Phil walked down the elegant staircases of the fortress, following the sounds of voices from below. He could tell Techno and Wilbur were talking and wasn’t too happy to walk in on that convo. <strike> <em> (Why didn’t he tell Techno about Wil. </em> <b> <em>Why didn’t he tell Techno about Wil–</em> </b> <em> ) </em> </strike>. But it sounded like they were getting along, which was a relief.</p><p>“Dad!” Wilbur called, body tilted to look around Techno’s large frame. He waved excitedly and rushed over to his father.</p><p>“Hey, son.” The blond dipped his head and forced away a grimace when he greeted Technoblade. “Techno.”</p><p>The father and son hugged tightly and Wilbur began to talk as soon as he was let go.</p><p>“Dad! Look, I made a friend!”</p><p>“You mean Techno?” Wilbur nodded aggressively, curls bouncing. Phil smiled brightly. “How lovely. He’s–”</p><p>“Yeah! We’re the same age, too.”</p><p>Silence.</p><p>They’re the same– <em> What. </em></p><p>Woah, woah, woah, woah––hold the fucking door.</p><p>“I’m sor– What.” Is all Philza could mutter in his shocked state. <em>Oh Jeb.</em> <em>Have I been committing mass genocide with a child? Please tell me he’s not fifteen. Please–– It’s just a joke, right?</em></p><p>Techno, forgetting that he had never mentioned to Phil how old he was, decided to use this situation to his advantage and fuck with the man’s brain a bit more. “Yeah, we also have the same birthday.”</p><p>Another long beat of silence.</p><p>“<em> What. </em>”</p><p>Wilbur gasped, oblivious to the emotions going through the war buddies. “We’re like twins, dad. Oh my Jeb, we’re like twins!”</p><p>“Techno. Techno.” The blond continued under his breath. “Techno <em> please </em> tell me you’re not fifteen years old.” Phil’s gaze bore into the half-Piglin’s mostly black eyes.</p><p>The warrior shrunk just slightly, not used to whatever look Phil had donned at that moment. Was the disappointed dad look that misbehaved kids got? Was this the look he’s heard before but never received? He didn’t like it. Well it’s not like he was misbehaved. Or a child, for that matter.</p><p>“Uh…” He swallowed nervously and steadied his voice. (An anxious smile wormed its way onto his face but it came out more as a cringe mixed with a grimace). “Phil, do you consent to me sharing information that could possibly alarm you?"</p><p>Wilbur tilted his head in confusion, but it went unnoticed. He looked rapidly between the two in search for something that could explain to him what was going on.</p><p>Philza sucked in a breath, closing his eyes and dragging his hands down his face. <em> Stay composed, Phil, stay composed. </em></p><p>“<em> Please </em> tell me I have not been committing WAR CRIMES with a <em> FIFTEEN YEAR-OLD </em>?”</p><p>“You technically committed them with a fourteen year-old.” Techno shrugged nonchalantly.</p><p>Phil spluttered but Techno just kept speaking.</p><p>“You’ve known me for like, two years, haven’t you?”</p><p>A pause.</p><p>“Oh. My. Jeb. <em> No. </em>”</p><p>Technoblade cackled and Wilbur just chuckled nervously, getting the gist of what was going on but was still slightly out of the loop.</p><p>“YOU WERE <em> THIRTEEN? </em>” The man flopped down on the plush sofas by the fireplace, unable to stay upright anymore.</p><p>Instead of replying or being of any help, Techno only cackled harder, throwing his head back in maniacal laughter. He clutched his stomach and doubled over from where he stood, physically unable to form words in that moment. It was at the point where <em>tears</em> were coming out of his eyes with how hard he was laughing. <em>Tears.</em></p><p>Wilbur pouted and sat down across from his dad, arms crossed. “When <em> I </em> was thirteen, I was learning how to play the guitar and you were out here committing war crimes. <em> Daaaad </em> , that’s not <em> fair </em>!”</p><p>Phil only sagged further into his seat, burying his head in his hands. Techno’s laughter and Wilbur’s frowning did not cease for a long while.</p><p> </p><p>Ah well, there’s no going back now.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope you enjoyed! They're really short, I know, but this is just a joke fic. If you'd prefer longer stuff or more angsty stuff, check out my 'It just sucks it played out like this' series where we've got neglectful dad!phil!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Scenario 2, 1st ending</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Regular old Phil finds out Techno is 15 but there's also Techno finding out Phil is in his thirties and not in his early twenties like he thought.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>There are two endings to this scenario/chapter so I will be posting the other one probably tomorrow or later this week. (Tonight, even, if I'm lucky).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Phil and Techno had just finished making some trade deals with Piglins in the Nether. As they were walking away, a thought crossed Phil’s mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Techno,” he started as they neared the Nether Portal, “when do Piglins stop growing? I’ve noticed a lot of the local adult Piglins in this area don’t seem to stop growing. Do you guys just keep growing until you’re thirty or something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno thought for a minute as they warped through the Portal. “Uh, I think it’s the same as humans? We do most of our growing before sixteen, like regular human teenagers.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil’s eyes widened a bit but he didn’t think much of it. He chuckled and walked quickly to keep up with the long strides of his companion.”Wow. You’ve had quite the late growth spurt then, huh?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno stopped suddenly in his tracks. ‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>You’ve had quite the late growth spurt then, huh?’</span>
  </em>
  <span> kept replaying in his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>HE DOESN’T KNOW HAHAHAH   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   oh my god phil is so fucking clueless   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   wait you never told phil how old you are????   HE THINKS YOU’RE AN ADULT AHA   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   TECHNOCHILD</b>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno cringed and realized he hadn’t responded. He didn’t really know </span>
  <em>
    <span>how</span>
  </em>
  <span> to respond because of course Chat wasn’t helping him and he didn’t really want to lie to Phil. So he just sorta stood there and smiled awkwardly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil was no longer chuckling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Techno.” He said calmly, turning to his friend slowly. “Techno </span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span> tell me you aren’t sixteen. You better not be fucking sixteen years old.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am not sixteen.” He confirmed with nervous lilt to his voice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil practically sagged with relief and he turned to resume walking. “Oh </span>
  <em>
    <span>thank Jeb–</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m actually fifteen.” Now he was really smiling. As much as he didn’t like seeing Phil distressed, he sure loved to fuck with the man’s head sometimes. “Not sure how that’s any better?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>WHAT?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Phil whirled right back around, wings flapping with alarm. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>MOTHERFU–”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno had to use every bit of his willpower to stop himself from dissolving into a fit of laughter right then and there.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They stumbled into the fortress that night, Phil still dazed and having a silent existential crisis, but otherwise doing fine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dad! You’re home!” A blur of yellow barreled into Phil’s arms, followed by two ‘oofs’.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘Dad’?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Techno echoed with disbelief.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   DADZA??   DADZA   DADZA   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   phil’s a dad??? Huh?   DADZA   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD   you’re both clueless</b>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh you must be Technoblade! It’s nice to meet you. I’m Wilbur.” The brunette boy let go of his dad(?) and stuck his hand out. He smiled a lot.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno shook it gently, eyes narrowed. He shot a look to Phil that clearly said ‘I need an explanation’. Phil had the guts to laugh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s nice to meet you too. Excuse us a moment.” He beckoned Phil to follow him and lead him away to an empty corridor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phil I wasn’t aware you had a son. Aren’t you a bit young to adopt?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Adopt? He’s my biological son.” The blond’s head titled in confusion and he shifted on the balls of his feet.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Heh?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Techno looked frantically between the direction Wilbur was in and Phil. “You– He’s your </span>
  <em>
    <span>biological son?</span>
  </em>
  <span> How?”</span>
</p><p>
  <b>UH OH   DADZA POG??   WHAT   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA   DADZA POG   How old is Phil?   DADZA POG   DADZA POG   DADZA   things are getting intense in the antarctic empire ladies and gentlemen   DADZA</b>
</p><p>
  <span>“Techno…” Phil very carefully drew out the name, expression going from confusion to realization, then to a mix of awe and amusement. “You do realize I’m in my thirties, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh. No. No no no.” Techno backed away, groaning and shoving his hands over his eyes. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No.</span>
  </em>
  <span> What? H–”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever Phil was planning on saying next was interrupted by a cackle being ripped from his throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re in your thirties?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re fifteen?” The blond countered.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re in your thirties?</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re fifteen?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“YOU’RE IN YOUR THIRTIES?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“YOU’RE FIFTEEN?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno inhaled a big breath of air. “You’re almost old enough to be my </span>
  <em>
    <span>father. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I have been committing </span>
  <em>
    <span>war crimes</span>
  </em>
  <span> with an </span>
  <em>
    <span>adult.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was Techno’s turn to have the existential crisis, apparently, because now Phil was doubled over laughing and Techno’s mind was reeling. It didn’t take as long for the Piglin to calm down as it did for the blond, thankfully.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wha– You’re an adult and you didn’t think to stop me from committing murder, amongst </span>
  <em>
    <span>many other war crimes?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Techno asked. “I thought that’s what adults do! You should’ve been the responsible one. I was an impulsive child–”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“In my defense, I thought you were an adult and knew I was one too! You never thought to fucking warn me you’re a literal child.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pause of silence where the two were catching their breaths and reigning in their thoughts. It quickly transformed into more laughter though and soon enough the two could barely breathe.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Technoblade collected himself first and grinned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Any other secrets you’re keeping from me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil scoffed and shook his head, smiling. “No. No more ‘secrets’, as you put them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.” The Piglin nodded sternly, though his features were warm and a twinkle of amusement shone in his eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two began to walk back to where Wilbur was still waiting for them in the entrance. The last thing that went through Phil’s head before Wilbur chattered on about his faction was:</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Why the fuck is a child so good at committing war crimes?</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope you enjoyed this one!<br/>Credits to @/strawberiitea @/craftybeanbo and @/pixelavi on tumblr for this particular scenario.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Scenario 2, 2cnd ending</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The same as the last chapter––Phil finds out Techno is youger than he thought and Techno finds out Phil is older than he thought. But this is an alternate ending to the last chapter!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>They stumbled into the fortress that night, Phil still dazed and having a silent existential crisis, but otherwise doing fine. When they turned into the main living room where the big fireplace is, Techno’s expression stiffened at the unknown figure there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phil,” He murmured lowly, squinting to try and make out who the person was, “who’s that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The blond’s eyes widened and his features brightened. “Oh! I completely forgot to mention a guest visiting tonight––Kristen!” He called out to the figure as they approached them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The figure, Kristen, turned around. A big smile plastered on her face as she ran to Phil. “Phil! My love, it’s so good to see you again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They laughed and embraced while Techno awkwardly shifted on the spot.</span>
</p><p>
  <b>E   E   E   E   KRISTEN???   E   WHO’S THIS   E   E   E  KRISTEN?   ‘My love’ ?? :eyes:   E   E   E   E   E   MY LOVE?? HELLO? IS NO ONE GONNA MENTION THAT   E   E   KRISTEN POG</b>
</p><p>
  <span>“Techno! Phil’s told me so much about you. I’m Kristen.” The ebony-haired lady stuck her hand out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hullo. Nice to meet you.” He said, shaking her hand. He shot a confused look at Phil.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil forced a smile that looked more like a grimace. “Techno, this is my wife, Kristen.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wife?” The Piglin echoed, mind coming to a stand-still briefly before rushing back into action. Chat shouted out remarks and comments that he couldn’t keep up with and they sent his mind reeling. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chat, shut up for a second.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kristen’s lips turned down into a small pout. “Did you not tell him about me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil fiddled with his gloves, chuckling nervously. “Well, uh, I might’ve– I might’ve forgotten…?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The lady’s eyebrows drew up and she crossed her arms. “You conveniently forgot to tell your friend you have a wife? Especially when she’s here now?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno wanted to back away and just leave. He doesn’t like this. Sure, she seems lovely and no doubt he’ll get along with her. But he doesn’t like talking to people no matter the circumstance. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please just let me leave.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil and Kristen quarrelled for a bit longer before Techno cleared his throat. Oh great. Now they’re looking at him. Fuck, he’s got to think of something to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh, didn’t you– didn’t you marry a bit young, Phil? Not judging or anything of course, just– yeah.” The Piglin didn’t really intend for that to be the thing to come out of his mouth, but now that he was thinking about it, Phil </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> marry kinda young, right? Do humans usually marry at twenty-ish years old? Most of the human couples he’s seen have married mid to late twenties.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil’s brow scrunched up in confusion. “Do Piglins do it differently? Marrying in their thirties is pretty common for humans.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Technoblade blinked.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Marrying in their thirties is pretty common for humans’.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <b>KRISTEN POG   KRISTEN POG   KRISTEN POG   You alright there Techno?   KRISTEN POG   KRISTEN POG   HE’S MARRIED?   KRISTEN POG   KRISTEN POG   ooh tea   KRISTEN POG   THIS TOOK A TURN   KRISTEN POG</b>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?” He gritted out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just said marrying in their thirties is pretty common for humans. Do Piglins marry at a different age?” Phil looked a bit more confused now, as did Kristen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Phil…” Techno drew out carefully. “Phil, how old are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Chat exploded in his mind but he expertly tuned them out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m thirty-two, mate.” Phil replied. Something seemed to click in his mind because he asked Techno, “How old did you think I was?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno, ignoring Kristen’s quiet laughter beside him, kept his gaze on the fireplace in front of them and refused to look elsewhere. “Twenty or so.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Phil erupted into laughter and Techno clenched his jaw out of embarrassment.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m–” His words died in his mouth as another cackle overtook the blond. “I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>flattered</span>
  </em>
  <span> but I’m afraid you’re a decade off, mate.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Techno knew the couple wouldn’t stop laughing for a while, so he numbly walked over to one of the couches by the fire and sat down. He rubbed his eyes and thought for a few minutes, whispering to himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been committing war crimes with a whole-ass adult. He has a wife and I let him take over the world with me. Am I a monster?”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Credits for this specific chapter go to @/pan-fried-stupidity on tumblr :D</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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